Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Two Penny Saga: The Woman on the Train

My cousin, Geoffrey, suggested this first line to me.  I wrote for five minutes.  This is what I got.  (If any of you have any more suggestions for prompts please let me know.) 

Dave woke up a few minutes before his stop. Bleary eyed, he looks across the short distance at the woman in the seat facing him. He couldn't help but notice that her head was ridiculously large. That or her body was ridiculously small. Either way, she looked ridiculous.

“Can I help you?” The woman asked, glaring at Dave across the subway.

“Sorry,”  Dave looked away.  “It’s your head.  Is there something wrong with it?”  As soon as the words were out of his mouth, he wanted to take them back. 

The woman sniffed and looked out the window.

“I didn’t mean it that way!”  Dave protested.  “I’ve had a really long day and-.”

“HEY!”  A little voice shouted. 

At first Dave assumed that the woman had a radio.  She hadn’t said anything but the voice had clearly come from her.  He was about to ask if she had heard it too when the woman’s ear swung out of her head.

Dave blinked, convinced that it was just the stress of the job affecting him.  When he looked again, though, Dave saw that woman’s ear had opened like a door.  A tiny purple old man with enormous ears was stepping out onto the woman’s shoulder. 

“What do you think you’re doing insulting my house like that?” the man squeaked. 

“I-.”  David stammered.

“How would you like it if I said your hose had a weird head?”  The tiny man turned back to the woman.  “Did he insult you?”  The woman nodded pitifully.  “I’m sorry!”  He tugged on her red hair.  “Later today I can trim your hedges.  Would you like that?”

The woman grinned. 

The man touched one of the moles on the side of her cheek.  “I need to have the painter come by and take a look at this.”  He walked back inside the woman’s head, and slammed her ear shut.  Dave could hear him inside the woman’s skull cleaning dishes and humming to himself. 

From that day on Dave took the bus home.   

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